There is still a secret with this change, which relates to my problems to the past, which since they've happened, since 1-2 years ago i've been trying to lose weight, this is because i dont feel good with my physical apperance, i think that... i just dont look right for my age and that i should look like people at my age, yes i have lost weight but i still think the same way and think there's alot more to lose and i will get there one day, however with all these problems i'm scared to feel worser, if these situations have happened i think there's more to happen in future and if i was able to self-harm those future problems may cause me to think worser (self-harm once again or even lead to suicide), i feel yet still that sooner or later my life will come to an end and not in a good way... :/